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April 15th has come and gone.

I spent Saturday-Wednesday morning in Arizona for work.

My set up while I was there.

Yup, that's a folding chair.

When I was working my laptop was actually higher than normal,

so my shoulders were killing me after about 10 minutes of typing.

I spent one 15 hour and two 13 hour days right there.

 The drive into the "office."

The view out the window of the office.

The last day I was there, one of the 

office workers brought in her puppy.

So, that was a definite morale booster.

The trip was fine and while it included very long hours in a folding chair, the work was easy. It was really hard being away from my office the week of April 15th. I had to catch a 6:15am flight out of Phoenix on Wednesday morning just to be able to get back here in time to wrap up extensions and last minute filings.

I'm pretty exhausted. And normally, April 16th, our office is closed, but I have to work to catch up from being gone. Blarg.

In other happenings... My knee was feeling much, much better until I drove for an hour on Tuesday night. Something about the position of sitting while driving really jacks it up. So, I don't know. I did manage to jog a few miles on the treadmill one morning while I was away and it felt OK. Not great, but OK.  

Aside from work, I've had kind of a rough go of things lately. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, I can't really complain too much... but emotionally I am a mess. In the past couple of weeks, I've had a tragic experience with a stray dog on the side of the road (I didn't think quick enough to stop immediately, so, I had to go to the next exit to turn around and loop back, and I didn't make it time. Heartbreaking. I still can't even really think about it).

And late last Thursday, my phone started blowing up with texts/calls from my best friends from college. One of our friends and brothers (we were all in an honor fraternity and guys and girls referred to each other as brothers. weird, I know) committed suicide. And while, I haven't seen him since I graduated college almost 13 years ago, it still hurts and breaks my heart. Taking your own life because you feel like that's the only chance you have to be at peace, is the most tragic thing I can think of. I'm so sad that he was in that place.

I'm sad and tired and stressed and I just really need something happy and good right now.

And lucky for me, there is something on the agenda.......My brother is getting married this weekend!!! So, that is exciting. It's the first wedding in my immediate family, so, it's a pretty big deal. And weddings are always such a happy occasion, I'm excited to get to celebrate it. And even though they've been together something like 10-12 years, this whole thing does make me feel like I'm officially gaining a sister, which is nice. I always wanted a sister. 

I'm ready for this dark cloud of sadness to get booted away and I am sure that a weekend surrounded by love and family is just the ticket.

Running: The Hobby

I am having a hard time getting back into running. Of course, I expected some of that. Running sucks when it's hard. But just because I expected it, doesn't mean it makes it any easier.

This morning while running, I started thinking about why I run. I've done many, many posts on that topic, so, I'll spare you another. But the two biggest things are that running makes me feel good about myself and I think the physical exercise keeps the black dog at bay. Running is not just my exercise of choice, but for the last few years, it's been a big part of my identity, as well. At it's core, running is my escape from the humdrums of life and my biggest hobby.

Now that I'm in my 30s, I find myself comparing to myself to my parents a lot. Every day, I look more and more like my mom.

 

 My mom's in the pink.

My aunt's in the white.

Yes, they are wearing matching rompers, but in different colors.

Yes, you could do that in the 80s.

I will never be as hot as my mom was, however.

She's had 3 kids in this pic and I've had ZERO and my 

body will never look this good. 

 And every day I find my personality becoming more and more like my dad. When I was growing up, my dad was a hobby enthusiast. He was a member of a Spelunking Club and a Spoonplugging Club (also known as a fishing club). And he took us out camping and on the lake a LOT.

Spelunking Club.

My dad is second from the left.

He's always been interested in cars and when my brothers got older and interested in them, too. They spent MANY hours every week together working on old cars.

And now you know where I get my body from.

Stumpy legs and long torso. Thanks, Dad!

To get all therapist-y on my dad, I think a big part of him keeping busy and having lots of different hobbies and interests is for a couple of main reasons. One, he was drafted in the Army as a young man, and I think having 2 years of your life taken away from you to serve your country would put anyone's spare time into perspective.

Stationed in Alaska.

And two, he was the sole provider for my family and worked long and hard hours at a desk. He definitely worked/still works more and harder than I do, but, I too feel the need to do something with my life when I'm not at work.

Back in the day, visiting dad at the office on a Saturday.

Please note, he has a pic of me on the credenza behind him.

All the gratuitous photos and stories of my family to say... I've realized that running is pretty much my only hobby. I mean, sure, I do other things... I read and watch television and I enjoy cooking and yoga. I would love to hike and camp more often than I do now. And while travel is probably the thing I love most, it's not something that I can do every week/weekend (see: why I don't hike and camp as much as I would like to).  So, the fact that running has become such a chore for me, is kind of slowly sucking away at my soul.

Ahhhh the good ole days.

When my main hobbies included clomping around in adult shoes...

 

And hosting my dolls and imaginary friends

for tea parties.

When the hobby that makes you the happiest and feel the best about yourself, suddenly turns into dogshit, it's hard to get back on track. And it starts affecting your daily life.

All this navel-gazing to say... I think my mental focus on running right now needs to shift into a different direction. I'm going to try not to worry too much about GETTING BACK INTO SHAPE IMMEDIATELY. But, into trying to find enjoyment in running again. Getting back into shape and mileage and speed will all eventually come back.

I feel like I've written these sentiments in MANY posts over the course of the past year or so. And I know, it's boring. But it's something I'm really struggling with. It's not as easy as.... just run when you want! Because, honestly... I'd barely be running if that were the case. And whether I like it or not... I NEED TO RUN. I like who I am when I'm running a lot: I feel better, I sleep better, I work better, I'm a better partner and friend. But, I'm finding that maybe wrapping up so much of my identity into one hobby can be a dangerous game. I wonder if spelunkers have as many existential crises as I do?

August Favorites

This is going to be a dump of a post wherein I talk about my favorite things from the month, as if I were some kind of consumer guru or something.

Favorite ACTIVITY:

Whitewater Rafting the Ocoee

The picture is not of my raft, because holy hell not only do you pay $98 per person for a trip. But then they have the audacity to charge you $54 for a cd of your pictures AND ask you to tip your guide. Um. Wut? Despite the price gouging the trip was an absolute blast. If it wasn't an exhausting all day excursion to get there, I would probably quit my job to become a guide and raft that sucker 5 days a week. But it is WAY far away from Nashville. We left at like 8:30 in the morning and got home just after midnight. Anyway, it was so much fun. I'm pretty sure all I did was sit in the back and giggle like a maniac while simultaneously kneeing The KoB in the back. (I laugh hysterically when I am nervous/anxious).

Favorite SONG: 

Burnin' it Down by Jason Aldean

I d/led this song WHILE DRIVING to Asheville and listened to it about a zillion times on the ride because my mom's car stereo is freaking awesome. USB ports in cars???? Whoa. I don't even think USB's were a thing when my car was made in 2002.


*I included this pic of Jason Aldean because I just wanted to say that probably my least favorite song of the month is a little ditty called Hannah Montana by a rapper Migos. Watch the video. You'll be chanting HANNAH MONTANA all day. Seriously... it's a song about Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana. And it's ridiculous and frustratingly catchy.

Favorite TV SHOW:

The Americans

Holy Moly. BEST SHOW EVER. I've only seen one season (Season 2 isn't on dvd yet), but my interest and love for this show is almost as great as it was/is for The Wire. If you aren't watching the Americans. You need to be. SO GOOD! Such a great premise and so weird to be rooting for Russians. Like. Really weird. Plus the cars and clothes... OMG you gotta watch it.

Runner up:

Bojack Horseman.

Just watch it. I can't explain it.


Favorite DRINK:

Illusive Traveler Shandy

It's no secret that I am not a fancy beer drinker. I hate the taste of hops and I would pick a Miller High Life or a Beast Ice over pretty much any other beer in the world. (There are a COUPLE of exceptions: Innis and Gunn and Yazoo Dos Perros being the only two basically). However, Liz and I met for drinks this weekend and this beer was introduced to us and WOW. Delicious.

Favorite FOOD: 

Blue Mountain Pizza and Brew Pub

If you ever find yourself in Weaverville, NC you should go here immediately. Although, no one ever finds themselves in Weaverville, so instead... if you ever find yourself in Asheville, NC and don't mind driving 25 minutes to eat some DELICIOUS pizza... then go here. While I might not be a beer connoisseur, I do know my pizza and this place was legit.


Books finished/started and thoughts:  I finished Ken Follett's World Without End in August: FANTASTIC of course. And also read Lee Smith's Guests on Earth which was absolutely wonderful for the first 150 pages or so.. and then completely burned out for the last half. Currently in the middle of a book about Russian hikers who died in 1959 called Dead Mountain. So good!

Favorite MOVIE:

The African Queen

I must admit, I am not the biggest Humphrey Bogart fan. But I am a HUGE Katharine Hepburn fan. I never watched this movie because the plot synopsis sounds boring and crazy as shit:

In Africa during WW1, a gin-swilling riverboat owner/captain is persuaded by a strait-laced missionary to use his boat to attack an enemy warship.

Ummmm. Wut? That shit sound cray. But, on a whim, I gave it a whirl and was completely and utterly entranced for the whole movie. Brilliant! I loved it. That Katie Hepburn.... man, she was a real movie star.

 

 

Things I hate:

Summer is practically over. It has gone wayyyy too fast this year. Boooo.

Forcing It.

So, it's no secret that I kind took this summer off of running. I mean, yeah, I was still running... but, I only ran when I wanted to (usually only if I had a partner to run with or when my dog needed some wearing out). Turns out... "when I wanted to" ended up being around 10-20 miles a week.

It was nice. But, I miss being in running shape, I miss being completely exhausted at the end of a run and then the feeling you get afterwards. I miss being a little creaky when I first get up after sitting for too long. I miss firing off emails to Coach explaining myself when I rearranged my training or ran my workout too fast. I miss annoying the fuck out of The KoB by picking his brain constantly about running.

 

 So, I thought it would be so easy to get back into my routine of stringing multiple days of running together and managing to actually run more than 25 miles a week. Turns out, I was wrong.

While I miss all those things ABOUT running. I actually don't miss the running part, apparently. So... that's a bummer. Since my goal race is in November, I can't really spend anymore time pussyfooting around. I'm having to force my running these days. Once I get out of the habit of being disciplined about something... I just end up going into super lazy mode. I mean SUPER lazy.

 

That fan is fucking disgusting, btw.

I gotta shake it though. I am really excited about my goal race, and it's time to start working for it. Starting with: actually getting my ass off the couch and onto the pavement. Operation Get Off your Fucking Ass and Get Motivated is officially engaged.

July: Done

Well, It's July 31st. OMG WHERE IS THE SUMMER GOING?

Anyway, last weekend was a busy one.... I spent Friday night and Saturday helping The KoB freshen up his new house.

The Before.

I really wish you could experience the smell.

Smokers+Cats+Air Fresheners= THE WORST FUCKING SMELL IN THE WORLD.

The in progress.

Carpet pulled up, walls and ceiling primed.

Not Pictured: Beast Ice, Popcorn, and Frozen Pizzas.

That night the bitches and sonsabitches went out for a nice dinner together. The next morning I had to get up at 3:50am and fly to Milwaukee for work.

Basically, my office for 3 days.

It was a long three days.14 hours of work everyday. BUT, on the bright side. Spending 14 hours at work meant that I wasn't spending much time here:

In the picture, it almost looks quaint!

In reality, it was the grossest, most disgusting

hotel I've ever stayed at.

 The worst offense, though.... NO COFFEE!!!!

The work trip went really well, despite the long hours and the shittastic hotel, and we were able to even come home a day early. Yay! I also managed to drag my ass out of bed early one morning and get a little run in. The weather in Wisconsin was spectacular! And the scenery was beautiful... cornfields, golf courses, and gravel roads.

Now, I'm sure you are all like... OMG where is the running....

 

I anticipate getting a HERE WE GO email from Coach very soon. And I cannot wait. I am so excited about training for a shorter distance race.

Odds and Ends

So, to wrap things up... the rest of the trip to Leadville was nice. We took a train ride around the town on our last day and ate another pizza at High Mountain Pies. It was fantastic, and I was sad to leave.

View from the Train.

Yes, totally ridiculous.

Getting back to the real world was pretty stressful. Somehow, July has turned into a megacrazy Life and Work month. I've got about a zillion projects at work right now (IT'S JULY. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?) and The KoB is basically having the month of his life right now (leadville, closed on a home last weekend, and has some other exciting stuff coming up in a week or so). 

Mr. Bloom checking out his new Doghouse. 

Yup. That's a doghouse. It has an

air conditioning unit and a heat lamp.

And it is practically the same size as my entire condo.

I am trying to get back into some consistent running. I'm a little nervous that once I start actually training for the 10 miler that it is going to feel SO VERY HARD. But, I am definitely itching to get back into a routine. For now, I'm just milking the laziness and enjoying it. I have been able to keep up with 10 mile long runs (with not much else during the week), so, THANK GOD I'm at least able to run the distance of the goal race at a fairly respectable time.   

Anyway, that's what's going on with me. Not much to really report on running-wise. But life is good and running will be soon enough.

Weekend Update

First off... Please consider donating ANYTHING you can to Walden's Puddle. They suffered a fire on Monday and need donations to not only help rebuild, but to take care of the animals that survived in temporary shelters.

Picture taken from their blog here.

This is a makeshift tent/shelter that they have set up.

If you are unaware of Walden's Puddle and what they do, this is from their website:

Walden’s Puddle provides care and treatment to sick, injured and orphaned Native Tennessee Wildlife. We are the only professionally-staffed wildlife rehabilitation and education facility in Middle Tennessee. We do not charge for services and receive no federal or state funding at this time.

And just to drive my point home, here is a pic of an owlet that was found fallen out of its nest. Walden's Puddle helped find the owlet's home and get it back with it's family.

So cute!

 

So, yeah, if you love animals and if you can spare any amount of cash, please consider making a donation here: Walden's Puddle Donation Page.

***********************************************************

Okay.... the money begging is over. Now for a random blog post.

This weekend was good. I ran 10 miles with Melissa and didn't feel as miserable as I did running the same thing the week before. Progress. I guess.

Then The KoB and I headed down to the River house to inspect some things there and The KoB ended up coming up with a fancy beer sampler. Similar to what you see in fine breweries.

The River Beer Sampler 

6 American Beers

1 American Beast.

(also, you can see that the last two beers aren't opened. 

I drank the High Life. obvs).

And then we decided to watch a movie... The KoB said... let's watch The Patriot. Oh, okay. I remembered that Mel Gibson/Heath Ledger movie and had actually never seen it.

Two Thumbs Up!

Someone says at the bottom of the DVD case.

 

And then I was horrified to find out that there is another movie with the same name.

Fuuuuuuuuck.

From Wikipedia: The plot involves an American patriot who has to foil the plot of a militia to release a deadly virus. The film is rated R by the MPAA. It is Seagal's first direct-to-video film*.

 

Here is the description of Steven Seagal's character:  Near the town of Ennis, Montana**, local doctor and former government research immunologist Wesley McClaren (Steven Seagal) who has an interest in herbal medicine and is also a weapons and self-defense expert, is called to a hospital when people start dying from an unknown but very deadly disease.

WTF?

After the terrible movie, I texted my best friend Jeff, who is an immunologist. (He is not, however, an expert in weapons and self-defense, and has no interest in herbal medicine. Steven Seagal: 1, Jeff: 0):

No, Jeff. No, you don't.

Save yourself the 90 minutes.

The rest of the weekend was spent painting, watching Top Gear episodes, and laughing at my crazy dog.

He loves pillows.

July is going to be a crazy month, so it was nice to have a chill weekend. Even if I did waste 90 minutes watching a Steven Seagal movie.

*Direct to video. That makes sense.

**Ennis, MT! I've been there! Twice!

Catching up

Oh gifs. How I've missed you.

So, THANK THE LORD JESUS HALLELUJAH PRAISE GOD AMEN, I am DONE recapping the Grand Canyon. I might sprinkle in a post or two about gear, food, etc. But... maybe not. I don't really feel like I did it well enough to be an expert, but maybe I could suggest what SHOULD be taken/used, etc. (15 pounds of Little Debbie Snack Cakes? Probably not necessary).

Anyway... since then... I've been thinking that I'm gearing up to start marathon training again. I set my sights on a race in September and I was pretty gung ho to get started. 

The day before starting up.

After my first run "marathon training."

And I realize, you're probably just as sick of hearing about all this marathon cycling as you are the Grand Canyon. But, when you WANT SOMETHING SO BAD, it's hard to step away from it, ya know? But, I'm officially taking a hiatus from the BQ obsession. I'm trying to get back into loving running and I don't need the pressure of meeting a specific time goal looming over me.

Instead, my strategy is going to be to keep running with my friends and try to get my fitness back a LITTLE. I'm hopefully still going to run that race in September (uhhh... I need some new states this year, for chrissakes!), but I am not going to focus on specific time goals. At some point, when I do start training again, I will instead just focus on improving and PRing and not an exact time. Do I want to improve and get faster? YES. But at the expense of my sanity? NO.

In other news... At my yearly checkup, it was discovered that my Vitamin D Levels are too low. I'm going to start taking a prescription amount of Vitamin D and have it rechecked in 8 weeks. A quick google search on a Vitamin D Deficiency gave me some A-HA moments: 

Head Sweater: Uhhh... Unbeliveably so.

Stomach problems: Well documented here.

Down in the Dumps: Yup.

Fatigue: Oh yeah.

 Killing babies and whatnot.

I'm always so obsessed with my B-12 and Iron levels, that Vitamin D never really occurred to me. Just a reminder to get ALL the things checked out. If you're feeling a little off, or not quite like yourself... there could be an easy fix. I was afraid that I had just turned into a tired, sad, sweaty, poopy person because that's what happens when you turn 34. BUT MAYBE NOT!!!!!

 We'll see what I am in 8 weeks.

A Slow Start to a Good Week

Fair warning... this may be the last time you hear from me till next week. I have dubbed this upcoming week... HELL WEEK. Which means that I am attempting to spend this week getting all caught up at work. My goal is to have every tax return that is currently in my to do stack (I am hovering at about 33 right now) and all returns that come in during the course of the week (I'm expecting about 5, so, you can be sure that it will be 10+) finished by friday night. In and of itself, that should NOT be an impossible task. But, add my regular day-to-day bookkeeping, payroll preparation, and end of the month financials that I have to prepare and this is a monumental task and I might just keel over and die from caffeine intake.

My thoughts pretty much everyday from March 1-April 15th.

But... you don't care about my work. You are just as busy with all the shit you're doing, too... so, let's talk running, shall we?

Last week started off ROUGH. Monday the KoB met me for our regular evening run and I... uhhh... had to stop after 2 miles because my stomach was all kinds of broken. Fun!

But, for the rest of the week, I rallied. I didn't get in any speedwork or really hard runs... but, I did get in 10 miles on the trails (in the rain) and 20 miles through the streets of hilly Nashville. Seriously, the run felt like we were running uphill the ENTIRE time. Have fun running the Country Music Marathon, bitches! I shouldn't tease... because The Pig is just as hilly or hillier, so trust... I'll have my own problems.

The 20 miler didn't really feel all that hard, but I was pretty shocked by how slow we were running it, based on the effort I was putting forth. I kind of have a 20 miler philosophy though. The first 20 miler of a marathon season... I just want to survive it. I feel like if I can just get the miles done, then it's a success. After that... I'm all about watching my pace during the run or whatever. So, I was really pleased when I finished. Plus, as I tried to remind Melissa, time on our feet is probably more important training for the Grand Canyon anyway!

It was a good week for running. Hope I can ride this momentum train through this week, too...

Have a good week y'all and if I don't see ya again for a few days, I'll definitely be back to posting next week, if I'm still alive!

Another Week

I'm starting to feel like a broken boring record here. Sorry about that. That's one good thing about training plans and schedules: Automatic Blog Content.

But, here I am anyway, to talk about my mostly lackluster week of training.

I did race on Saturday, which was BY FAR the highlight of the week. So much so, that it deserves it's own blog post. So, stay tuned for that.

The rest of the week included lots of smallish runs. My longest run of the week was a whopping 9 miler on Thursday. I had hoped to crack the double digits in a run on Sunday, but I woke up with a raging hangover that included a bad case of the pukes. Not pretty. I am old. I cannot hold my alcohol anymore.

But the party was fun and worth it! Irish Car Bombs and friends... doesn't get much better than that.

Dear Brother, Sorry your evening was cut short because I had

to run to the bathroom and puke.

Bitches representin'. 

I am slowly but surely starting to get my passion and motivation back for running. I think I am very susceptible to vitamin/mineral deficiencies and I have been REALLY bad about taking my iron and B vitamin supplements lately. I trying to get back into that habit, because I honestly can tell a HUGE difference in my running when I am good about taking them (and I don't even care if it's a placebo effect thing or not. If it works, it works).

I still haven't signed up for the Pig yet. But, I'm still pretty sure I'll run it. Even if I'm not in PR shape, I really do love that race and it will be good training for the grand canyon. Plus, it's about 6 weeks away. So, if I can string together a decent amount of running between now and then, I might just have a shot at having a decent day.

The Business of Blogging

Or... alternate title... My non-business of blogging.

Over the weekend I received an email from another running blogger. First, let me say that I LOVE getting emails from bloggers, readers, etc. I average about .0003 of such emails a month, so, when I get one, I get very, very excited!

Re-enactment.

I opened the email and read it. The emailer said they liked my blog (obvi) and then briefly described their blog and asked if I would check it out and if I liked it, if I would post a link to their blog on my blog. Blog blog blog.

Uh. What? First of all, my blog seriously has about 10 regular readers. Of those readers, 1 is my boyfriend, and there are like 7 others who are friends of mine in real life. My mom doesn't even regularly read my blog anymore. Trust me, by having a link to your blog on my blog, you are not going to get anymore traffic. Furthermore, the people's blogs who I do link, are friends of mine or awesome runners that I am jealous of. (And in most cases, both. I'm still waiting for the Best Friend invite from Kris Lawrence).

Anyway, the email just kind of set me off. I realize that this probably happens a lot in that whole "blogging business world" (Whatever the fuck that is). But, clearly, this grammar butchered, mostly written in passive tense, gif-riddled blog is not a "business blog." THANK GOD. And I honestly don't care who links to my blog or reads my blog, or whatever.

Which got me thinking... why do I waste time on this blog then?

1. Well, of course, a big part is flat out narcissism. I like me. I like writing about me and I hope you like me and like reading about me!

2. It's like a dumb diary/detailed training log. 

3. It gives me a reason to collect gifs and share them with my friends. (This is actually moving up to #1).

4. As embarrassing as it is to admit... I actually enjoy writing and because I can't finish half of the bazillion short stories I've started, this gives me a chance to practice "writing" and finding my voice and all that writing bullshit.

Do I want this blog to turn into my full time job? HELL TO THE NO. I enjoy working and I enjoy being able to write whatever the hell I want, when I want. I do not envy full-time bloggers at all.

Do I want this blog to get me a book deal? HAHAHAHAHAHAH. About what? gifs? about being a mediocre runner? Uh. No thanks. A book of my shitty college poetry? or a book of incomplete short stories? Still, no.

Do I want this blog to get me free shit? What? Like janky protein powder, stupid race themed jewelry, or a vitamix? No thanks. Full disclosure: I did once receive a case of Pom juice in the mail. And then I drank them and didn't blog about it.

I don't mean to pick on this person who emailed me. They may have an absolutely amazing blog and they could have very pure intentions of just trying to meet/find other like-minded bloggers. But, I haven't checked out their blog and I probably won't because it just feels so... icky.

File this under: A regular Tuesday night

between me and The KoB.

So, I don't know. I'm not even sure why I wrote this post. I guess to remind myself why I enjoy blogging. Sure, I love meeting other runners and bloggers. But, I have no interest at all in doing it for "networking" purposes.

/rant.