Trip Report: Leadville Part 2

I should point out that I took more drugs on this trip than I have in the last 5 years. From the moment we got into Denver, I started popping Excedrin Migraine pills and I didn't stop until we left. I also tried to stay as hydrated as possible. I wanted to be able to enjoy the vacation and not be knocked on my ass with terrible headaches from the elevation. The limited exposure I'd had in the past to elevation... always made me feel a little... off and headach-y. So, I went into the trip as prepared as possible.

We woke up on Saturday morning and plodded down for breakfast. I had always shied away from Bed and Breakfast places... mostly because they are usually more expensive and I am a cheap ass. But, also, because I like the anonymity of my regular ole Hampton Inns. I don't necessarily want to feel like I have chat it up with the other guests. So, I was a little nervous about the whole "breakfast" thing. Turns out... it was totally fine. The food was delicious, the people were friendly and talkative, and since we were in Leadville, anytime I didn't feel like engaging in the conversation... I just announced to everyone that The KoB had ran the race there before and everyone's attention turned to him and I got to sit and eat my meal in peace. Brilliant plan!

We started the day by milling around the town for a bit, grabbing lunch, and then we headed out in the car to drive around part of the Leadville 100 course.

The first stop was Turquoise Lake.

 Look how tiny I make that pine tree look!

Pygmy pine tree!

The lake was beautiful and it was an absolutely gorgeous day. There were tons of people out fishing, hiking, and just enjoying the day.

 

We drove all around the lake (as opposed to ya know... running around it) and then headed over to the Fish Hatchery which is also on the course. On our way there, he pointed off in the distance to a spot on a mountain where the trees had been cut, and told me that was Powerline (also on the course). 

 

The KoB running down the powerline in 2011.

It was straight up a mountain.

I wish I had gotten a picture of it from the ground.

Next time!

We got to Fish Hatchery, which is actually a working fish hatchery. I wasn't expecting that. Dumb, I know.

The view from Fish Hatchery.

After the fish hatchery, we got back in the car and The KoB said... let's drive over to Twin Lakes, "it's kind of a drive, but it's worth it." So, we drove out to Twin Lakes and boy was he right... 

It was spectacular.

We got out and walked around a bit, he told me a little history about the area and then he pointed up into the mountains and said.... "I think that's Hope Pass between those two peaks."

 

He was pointing somewhere up there.

Hope Pass? WAIT. Isn't Hope Pass on the course? 

You mean, THIS Hope Pass?

 

Yup. So, we were still touring the course. I mean, 100 freaking miles. 50 miles out, 50 miles back. It didn't really hit me just how freaking far that is, until you spend half a day driving around it. Crazy. 

 

 Almost at the top of Hope Pass

Twin Lakes down below him.

Anyway, we spent a little time at Twin Lakes, I thought it was just beautiful there. 

Twin Lakes 2011.

Mile 60ish feeling good.

Twin Lakes 2014

Standing in the parking lot. Feeling like

he hates his girlfriend for making him pose for a pic.

This was also taken in the Twin Lakes area, I have this picture hanging up in my office at work. 

And I just found out that apparently, The KoB 

was feeling like CRAP here and threw

up a couple miles after this pic was taken.

So, um, maybe I should switch that pic out for a different one.

Also at Twin Lakes.

Post puke.

After walking around Twin Lakes a bit, we started to head back into town. We changed clothes in the car and got in a run on the Mineral Belt Trail in Leadville.

Stop it, Leadville. Just stop being so freaking beautiful.

The Mineral Belt trail is an 11.6 mile paved path that winds around Leadville. It offered some great views of the town, as well historical items and markers explaining the mining history of Leadville that afforded me opportunities to stop and pretend like I was soooo interested in all that, when really I was just dying for a break to breathe.

Pics or it didn't happen, bitches!

Honestly, the artifacts and history were really interesting.

This little cart was what the miners would ride down into the mines.

 It was such a cool trail.

After a long day of DRIVING around the Leadville 100 course (which just cracked me up all day) and a little jog along the mineral belt trail, it was time to head back to the room and clean up for dinner.

And enjoy some refreshments from our balcony.

Next up: Mt. Elbert!

*I have tried to get The KoB to do some kind of post on Leadville and he always declines. So, this shoddy write-up by me is what you get instead... blame him. Also, I bought the pics from his 2011 race as a birthday gift for him one year and that's why I am plastering them all over the blog.

Trip Report: Leadville Part 1

I hadn't even heard of the town of Leadville, Colorado until I read the book Born to Run. That was back in 2009. The parts in the book about the Leadville 100 were easily my favorite and I vowed to visit Leadville one day and hopefully even go and spectate/volunteer/crew at the race. 

Enter The KoB... without getting into a whole... "this is the story of how we met, etc...," he was the only person I actually knew who had ran the race (Actually, he still might be. haha). I can remember being at a party at Coach Bitch and Cheryl's house in September (of 2010, I think?) and The KoB was there (having just ran the race in August) and I pretty much spent the entire party asking him questions (and getting one word responses back) and taking tequila shots.

So, here's the deal. The KoB has finished the Leadville 100 three times. 3 TIMES!!!!!!!

Yes, folks... that is a sub 24 hour finish.

He's ran the race 4 times and spent some summers out there training for the race. Leadville is The KoB's happy place. He loves it there and when he would talk about it, it just made me want to go there even more. So... we booked tickets and a room at a Bed and Breakfast and went out there over the July 4th weekend.

The first sign it was going to be an awesome trip? Because we had a long layover, we got offered to take a different flight from Nashville and got put into first class and each got a $200 travel voucher. FIRST CLASS, bitches! To be completely honest... it wasn't that great. I would never pay to be in first class and I was especially bummed that they didn't have Baileys for my coffee. THE HUMANITY! What kind of First Class doesn't have Baileys????????

Moving on... we arrived in Denver and got on the shuttle for our rental car. Then we had a Seinfeld moment. THEY DIDN'T HAVE A CAR AVAILABLE FOR US. 

Anybody can just take a reservation.

  

They even had the gall to tell us that... "well, it's a busy, holiday weekend." NO SHIT POTHEAD, that's why we made a reservation. Anyway.... someone dropped a car off as I fumed in the corner and we were on our way after not too long of a wait. 

I've never been to Colorado, so the whole drive I was like... OMG look over there. And OMG... look over THERE. And I think I asked The KoB if every mountain we saw was a 14er. 

Nope. Not a 14er.

Along the way, I was also regaled with stories of when The KoB biked across Colorado. (Yes, I know, he's the one that should have the blog, nobody gives a shit about me or my gifs). It was a nice drive, but I was happy when we finally arrived in Leadville.

We changed into running clothes and headed out for a little Leadville Running Tour led by The KoB. 

It was July 4th, so stopping for this picture

seemed apropos. 'Merica.

I knew it was going to feel tough. Running at 10,000+ feet is  no joke. But, we stopped to take pictures and kept the pace easy.

My, "Hey, take this picture of me

so I can catch my breath" pose.

Everywhere you look... beauty.

After the run, the skies cleared and we walked into town for dinner at a Mexican Restaurant that I had heard The KoB talk about many times.

Heading into town.

It was the perfect start to our trip. 

When in Colorado...

Next up: Seeing parts of the Leadville 100 Course and more running...

Race Report: Harpeth Hills Flying Monkey Marathon

Gross.

Disclaimer: So, again, I'm writing a race report for a race that I didn't run. But, just like last year, I can't NOT say anything about this race. There will be lots of bragging and pride for my man, so if that grosses you out, come back later in the week for regularly scheduled cat gifs and bitching about my training. Today, I try to write the story of November 24, 2013.

Yes, you are reading that correctly.

Officially: 2:49:10

I've never gotten it. Why would a talented, fast runner spend all Fall training for a race with an elevation profile like the Monkey? Why would someone put all that time, effort, sweat, and pain into a race that was going to be hard as fuck to PR at? I used to just write it off as... Ohhhh... it's The KoB. He wants the challenge, he likes the park, and he's just fucking insane. And sure... those things are all true especially that last part. But, I think I finally got it this year.

The KoB didn't grow up a runner. He didn't run for high school or college. Every second that he improves in a race is earned. Nothing is given to him. In a lot of ways... the Monkey Marathon is The KoB. They are tough, quiet, relentless, and they don't get a lot of respect.

Probably 98% of the people who run the Monkey... only run it because they like being able to say that they've ran it. It has this cult-like following that lends a vibe to the race as being a brutal jog in the park. Which is fine. It's a small race, with great swag, an accessible and friendly race director, and a beautiful course. Jog it, enjoy it. That's what I did in the past.

 See how much fun it is!!!!

I see The KoB as a kindred Existentialist spirit. Running for him (yes, I'm putting words in his mouth) is how he lives an authentic life. Sure, he's out there just like the rest of us: running for health, to soothe our OCD tendencies, to offset that half of an ice cream cake that we demolished yesterday, and of course chasing those demons that tell us we aren't good enough. But he's also out there because that's who he is and who he wants to be. He's a runner and so he runs.

The story of November 24, 2013 isn't one that you see on other blogs of SURPRISE! I JUST RAN THE RACE OF MY LIFE ON MEDIOCRE TRAINING AND A DIET OF PROTEIN POWDER AND JELLY BEANS! HEHE. No, it's a story of hard work, patience, sweat, hard runs, easy runs, lots of miles, not enough sleep, healthy food, sacrifice (Ohhhh the beers he missed out on!!), being too tired to move, not taking your girlfriend camping when she wanted to go camping, foam rolling, questioning your workouts, and running when you didn't want to run. But, the best part... is that it paid off. And isn't that the best kind of story?

This is probably the most clothes you will ever see on
The KoB for a marathon.
It was a really cold day.

Unfortunately, I can't regale you with the story of how he felt at mile 22 or how many Gus he took throughout the race... that would be his race report. But I can tell you that from my perspective, it was a nervewracking 2 hours and 49 minutes and 10 seconds. I was at the start line, so that I could start my watch when the race started. After watching the runners climb up the grassy hill, Melissa Bitch and I headed to my car and drove to the stoned gates to run backwards and cheer on the runners.

So many clothes!

(I can't talk trash. I had about 15 layers on).

We saw The KoB three times on the course and each time I tried to gauge how he was feeling by the 3 seconds that it took for him to run past me. I had a good feeling. I knew his training had gone well and I knew that he was feeling confident going into the race. Those two things are HUGE. I gave him a Gu around mile 17.5 and tried to figure out if it was a good thing that he only wanted 1 of the 2 that I had. Or if that was a bad thing. STRESS.

We booked it over to the start line and hung out in the warm car until it was time for the winner to be close to finishing. Last year The KoB broke 3 hours at the Monkey for the first time and came in at 2:57:33. I started nervously watching for him at 2:40. My eyes were peeled to the hill when finally someone said... IS THAT HIM??

 RUN!!!!

 Thank goodness this isn't a video.

Or you'd hear lots of screaming. And profanities.

 I kept looking at him and then looking at the clock.

BOOM. Sub 2:50.

He shaved 8 minutes off his time from last year. 8 minutes!!!!!!!!!!! What sub 3:00 marathoners do that in a freaking year??!?!?!?!?  Sure, he almost died at the finish. But thankfully, the most adorable dog in the world not biased licked his face and brought him back to life.

It was an epic day. And I was just happy that I was there to experience it with him.

The only time The KoB smiles is when

he's picking up his crotch crochet monkey for

coming in 4th overall.

To say congratulations doesn't seem like enough. But, it's all I got. Congratulations KoB! You inspire me and so many others with your hard work and determination. Now hurry up and recover so that you can pace me this weekend, m'kay? Thanks.

Race Report: Shelby Bottoms Boogie 15K

Otherwise known as... the first? race in this training cycle that kick my pansy ass.

Mistakes made:

1. I was actually excited about this race.

I hadn't ran a 15K in YEARS and considering the fact that I think the Half Marathon is my distance, I assumed that a 15K would be right in my wheelhouse these days. 

Lesson Learned: Going into a race with a cocky attitude, like you're going to be schooling bitches all day is just setting yourself up for failure.

2. Getting stuck behind a fuckton of slower runners at the start.

This race started 10 minutes after a 5K started. The 15K had to share a lane with the 5Kers on their way back. THE ROAD IS NOT THAT BIG. UGH. So, of course, I ran my first mile in like 7:20 instead of the 7:45ish that I was planning on.

Lesson Learned: Look at the course maps before the race and either line up closer to the front, or just try to adjust strategy to start out even slower and not worry about all the people that are in front of me lollygagging (particularly because they all ended up passing me in the last 2 miles of the fucking race because I was dying).

3. Engaging in a Battle Royale at miles 1-2 with the woman who would eventually win the damn thing.

After I had passed everyone that I felt like I needed to pass in the first 5 minutes of the race, I settled into a good spot and put cruise control on. Until some woman ran up to me. I'm sure that I instinctually picked up my pace a bit when she got there (duh). But instead of just powering by me, she settled in right next to me. I'd speed up a bit to lose her... she'd speed up. I'd slow down a bit to shake her... she'd slow down. I'd move to the left to avoid something on the road, she'd STAY IN HER SAME SPOT. And if I had to move further away from her, she'd move CLOSER TO ME. At this point, we had the whole road and she was on me like white on rice. It was driving me crazy. Finally, I was like... fine bitch, you wanna race. LET'S RACE. And I picked it up and tried to hang on. 

I could hear her coughing and clearing her throat a bit and I thought to myself... ohhhh... yes... I got this bitch. Because, I was feeling good. I was ready to school bitches. We ran past a water stop and neither of us stopped. We were neck-in-neck for two miles. Eventually, I pulled ahead a couple of steps of her and she let me stay there and then she pulled ahead and blasted by me. And then she eventually ended up passing ALL the women ahead of us and winning the damn thing.

Lesson Learned: Don't let some bitch determine your race pace THAT EARLY IN THE RACE. I was so pissed at her... trying to RACE me at such an early point in the race. But, I guess, I was just as guilty... letting her duel me.

4. Letting myself just get more and more disgusted with myself.

By mile 4 or so, I was toast. And instead of just letting that go and trying to focus on finishing the race, I kept telling myself in my head how shitty I was and how terrible I felt. Which just made me feel worse and more shitty.

Lesson Learned: RUN, don't think!

5. Skipping all the water stops.

It was an unseasonably warm day and after my warm-up, getting ready to line up in the corral, my friend Jeff commented: "You look like you've already raced." Translation: Whoa, bitch... why are you already sweating your ass off?

Lesson Learned: Uh, it's hot out... DRINK SOME DAMN WATER.

6. A 250 calorie Breakfast before a 9 mile race isn't probably enough.

I just completely ran out of gas. Between that and the water and the sweating... I was practically hallucinating the last few miles. Although, I don't think I hallucinated The KoB's encouraging/disgusted look at me when the 500th girl easily passed me with about a mile to go.

Lesson Learned: Food is fuel, bitch.

In the end I finished with a very disappointing time. I went from the 6th female overall around mile 4 to not even placing in my age group. It was disgusting, it felt terrible and frankly, it was embarrassing. I just completely collapsed out there.

 The KoB was nice enough to run out and pace me for the last 

4-5 miles or so. JUST IN TIME TO WITNESS MY COLLAPSE.

Awesome!

See those fuckers behind me?

Yeah, I'm sure they passed me, too.

EVERYONE PASSED ME.

My race sucked ass. But, as soon as I crossed the finish line and caught my breath and got over my disgusting performance, I asked The KoB how the 5K went...

"Meh." He replied.

"Did you PR?"

Shrug.

"Did you win?"

"Meh."

"Did you place?"

"Meh."

 

 The KoB at the start of his race.

Stalking his prey.

 

Finally, I gave up and walked over to the results board.

HE FUCKING WON THE DAMN THING.

ASSHOLE!

At least we had something to celebrate. And honestly, I think having a bad race day was good for me. It reminded me that racing well doesn't come easy. I have to work for it and the stars have to align in just the right way or ya know, I just have to not be an asshat and make stupid mistakes.

Race Report: Heroes in Recovery 6K

A couple of months ago, I spotted a race flyer with alpacas on it

Ummm. Best race poster EVER?

After finding out that there is an alpaca farm along the race course, I immediately put the race on my calendar. Because... ALPACAS... OBVIOUSLY.

As the race date grew near, I started to wonder about the actual course and was a little disappointed when I heard about this big ass hill:

At least there's a good downhill. Groan.

But, despite the hilly course, the random race distance, and the 35 minute drive to the race, I stayed firm in my decision about the race because... ALPACAS... OBVIOUSLY.

On Saturday morning I drove out to the race which is located in a little town full of horse farms and rich people. It was a beautiful morning. Cool and bright. I warmed up a little on the race course and to be completely honest, wasn't feeling good about my racing capabilities that morning. But, I lined up in the chute with friends and was like.. well... at least there are ALPACAS on the course.

I'm not going to bore you with a play-by-play of the race, but I do want to mention a few things:

1. Cheryl and I were getting ready to pass a woman very early in the race and she teased us: "This is a no passing zone, ladies." And as we passed her, all I could think about was... "well, if you'd speed the fuck up, I wouldn't have to pass you." Luckily, I didn't say this.

2. At the turn around point, I heard someone at the water stop tell the "no passing zone" lady that she was 3rd female. Ummmm... Whhhhhaaat?

3. After climbing the big hill and recovering from climbing the big hill, I was starting to feel like I was in a groove. By the turn around point, I was picking out people in front of me to pass.

4. I told myself that when I got to the 5K mark I was just going to go ALL OUT the last kilometer. 

5. I hit the 5K mark at 23:56 (7:43 pace) and then flipped into overdrive.

6. With about a half mile to go some guy spectator told me I was the 3rd female and I was sure that he was mistaken, but just in case he wasn't, I ran even faster.

Schooling.

7. I saw The KoB who had just finished 2nd overall come out to meet with about a quarter of a mile left and he helped me go into overoveroverdrive.

8. I finished the race in 28:13 (7:35 pace).

9. 3rd overall woman.

10. Clearly, there wasn't much competition... and while it was a little embarrassing that I came in third, I was also pretty freaking excited about it.. because, THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN TO ME. 

We were standing around after the race and overheard someone who had just finished saying.. "I NEED ROOM TEMPERATURE WATER." We all kinda looked at each other, like... uhhh... ok. 

A few minutes later we realized who that was:

Number 32 in the white sports bra to the left?

Yeah, that's Ashley Judd. 

 THIS Ashley Judd.

To be fair, she was yelling about the room temperature water to someone with her, not race volunteers. It was still pretty damn funny though. Anyway, she seemed nice and stuck around for the awards, etc. And yes, I schooled that bitch.

We hung around for the awards and because when I'm lucky, I'm REALLY lucky... I won a door prize... ALPACA SOCKS!

A smug KoB picking up his prize.

 Umm. The KoB doesn't hold tiny little bags

by their tiny little handles.

Probably the only time in my life I'll win an overall prize and 

this is the only photographic evidence I have.

It looks like I'm asking where the bathroom is.

FFS.

After the awards we ran out for a cool down which was really just an excuse to go visit the ALPACAS.

They were just chilling in the barn overhang.

Alpacas near the trees.

So, it was basically the perfect day: I placed overall, The KoB placed overall, I won a door prize, we beat a celebrity, and ALPACAS... OBVIOUSLY.

Recovery

I said it in my last post and I'll say it again.. FOR REALZ this time. I am taking a break. Wanna know how many miles I ran last week? 9!!!!!!! As in.. NOT EVEN DOUBLE DIGITS. And you know what's even crazier? I loved every minute of it.

Also, of course, I love my dog: I love how scruffy he is, how he struts when he walks, and how he picks up the biggest stick he can find and tries to walk with it in his mouth. But, one of the unexpected things I love about him is our walks. We walk 2-4 miles every day and damn, it's so enjoyable.

Well, it's enjoyable when he isn't yanking my arm out of 

socket when he sees a squirrel.

I think all that walking has helped with my recovery, too. Both physically and mentally. It's nice to have to get out of bed at 6am and take a nice stroll with the dog rather than wake up 7:30 and be foggy headed at work for the first hour or so. (Also, it's nice to not feel like a total sloth the week after a marathon).

The photos from the race came out... and per usual, I look like a fucking ghost.

Despite appearances, this is NOT 

the first time I've ever seen the sun.

Sadly, all the photos of me are from the end of the race... post shit/puke/side stitch. So, instead of looking awesome and excited about a PR possibility, I look like a cranky bitch.

Actually, I don't even know what this face is.

Am I even awake?

I like how it looks like I just totally busted through

that cone there. Bitches can't be reined in by a fucking cone.

 

The best part is that this time I got to finish on Hayward Field.

 

And for comparison, here is what running a 2:47 looks like

A goddamn cakewalk, for chrissakes!

Could you at least make it look like it's HARD????

 

All of my pictures I look like death on a stick, but of course The KoB's look like a fucking Nike ad.

Ugh. Where are my pictures in front of that sign?

Oh right. I was probably behind a tree somewhere.

In other news, a reminder for the 6 local people who read this blog (which includes 3 bitches, The KoB, and my mom): 

RUN BITCHES 5K 

this Thursday 6:15

@ Edwin Warner Park

Details on the race are here.

But really, all you need to know is that the course is flat, there are prizes for first overall Bitch and Sonsabitch and there will be booze, pixie sticks, and reese's peanut butter cups for the rest of us. Come on out!