Gear Review: Running Tops

Now that I've upgraded my sports bras and my running shorts, it was only a matter of time until I started thinking about my running tops.

Here's the progression of my running tops:

First... I went through a cotton t-shirt phase:

Awww... Now I kinda miss running in those old, soft, stinky t-shirts.

Then I went through a phase where I was wearing tight long bra tops:

Good god, why didn't any of you bitches tell me how unflattering that shit is?

Ack!

And lately, I've been in a looser, no built-in bra type of mood:

This one came from Old Navy and while I realize wicking doesn't work in 

99.99999% humidity, I might as well be wearing one of those stinky t-shirts.

I got this one at Target.

Disclaimer: Wearing it may lead to a DNF.

Earlier in the year, I bought some tops at Target and Old Navy for cheap. And while they're okay, a couple of the Target ones are kinda thick and hot and the Old Navy ones just turn into a wet, clingy mess.

So, I've been on a mission to find better running tops. GOOD ones that are lightweight, loose, and flattering. This sounds like an easy task, right? But, I've been scouring the internets for awhile now and haven't had much luck. Last Friday I took a peek at Lululemon's website (I know, I'm ashamed). And I stumbled upon this interesting top:

Hmmm. Okay. Looks like a nice, loose top.

Meet the Speed Squat Tank from Lululemon. From the front it just looks like your regular ole tech tank. But from the back:

BOOM Bitches, vented!

So, the back is split open. WHY HAS NO ONE EVER THOUGHT OF THIS SHIT BEFORE? Seriously, what the fuck are the design teams at Nike doing all damn day?

I wore this tank last Saturday for my long run and I have to say, at first, I was a bit self conscious in it. For one thing, it's a bit long on me in the front (what isn't?) and for another, it's a little... heyyyyy look at me and my bum and part of my back. Which, makes me very uncomfortable. No one should be looking at me when I'm a sweaty, no make-up mess. But any reservations I had about how ridiculous I looked in it, went out the window as soon as I caught the first breeze in this top. Holy shit. The breeze gently opens the back a little and you actually get some cool air on your sweaty skin that feels like a kiss from an angel.

Also, when you fan yourself with your shirt (do other people do this? just me?) you actually get relief because of the open back. It's seriously amazing and makes me want to go to town with a pair of scissors to the back of my existing tanks. 

So, I bought a couple of the tanks and am still keeping an eye out for any other good running tanks out there. I did order a Brooks one online that I should get tomorrow, so we'll see how that one works out (of course, I'll let you know) and I've had my eye on this tank:

Mainly, I like the shorter length. And it looks lightweight.

Sadly, sexiness not included.

I'm afraid that it's one of those cases where it looks good on you if you're a hot model who doesn't have to wear a bra and is just going to wear it for the elliptical or some shit. 

What kind of running tops do you wear? And if you're one of those bitches with flat abs and confidence who doesn't have to wear a shirt.... Rock on, girl! And then fuck off.