run, rest, eat, bitch, buy things, cross-train, blog, repeat.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

A letter.

Dear Women of Nashville:

Okay, so I've avoided this letter for a really long time. Not because it hasn't needed to be addressed, but because I kept turning a blind eye. I kept thinking that one day, some man would give me reason to assume that this issue isn't entirely limited to the female gender. I mean, I'm proud to be a woman, I support women's rights and high heels and all that crap. But, I feel like it's important to address something for our future safety.

Seriously, women. Learn how to freaking drive.

Initially, I took it personally. Every time you* tried to drive into me when I had the right of way (trust me... I always follow all traffic laws when running, I could die, otherwise) I gave you the finger, the evil eye, the string of curse words. And every time, you either never noticed me, or when you did notice me... you gave me the finger or the evil eye back! Like it was my fault you almost ran me over with your car. And if you did see me, after narrowly missing me, do you ever stop and let me proceed? Hells no. You blaze that piece o' shit car of yours right on through giving no consideration to the sweaty girl that you almost put in wheelchair.

Every single time, it's been a woman. Sure, I've had men start to turn into an intersection where I am lawfully crossing, but they always stop and let me go and and they give me the sheepish "sorry" look. So, what gives, ladies? How can you be so oblivious to your surroundings**?? Especially when you're operating a piece of machinery that could potentially KILL someone.

Look, I know you've got a lot on your mind. We ALL do. Between work, family, and the obsessive but essential analysis of the emailed phrase... "I'm just not looking for a relationship" that the douche you'd been seeing just sent you on your blackberry (I mean... A. what makes him think YOU are? B. and, even if you were, hypothetically, I mean... it's not like you want to get married in the next 3-6 months or anything and C. wonder if that means you're not going out on Saturday night? better leave your schedule open just in case, right?) you've got a lot on your plate. I get it. You're preoccupied (kids in the back screaming), you're multitasking (checking your emails or your hair), you're completely oblivious to everything around you. And do you have any idea how dangerous that is? You could kill someone. For chrissakes, look around before you plow through an intersection, especially when the light's green and you're turning without a green arrow.

I'm sorry to call you out like this. But, we need to take better care of each other and look out for one another.

Thank you for your time and attention to this matter. Hopefully from now on, the only time I'll be yelling obscenities at you and giving you the finger is when you're trying to flirt with my man at the bar.


* To clarify, let me say that I'm not claiming to be a perfect driver. Yes, there was that time I crossed railroad tracks in my Ford Taurus, where there wasn't a railroad crossing (how I was supposed to know you are supposed to only cross them at designated areas?). And yes, I did fly right through a red light the first day of my sophomore year of college and hit a dump truck (hey. i hadn't driven for a year, cut me some slack). But, I always am aware of my surroundings when I'm driving, especially when in the city. I mean, there are runners, walkers, hobos, and cyclists all over the damn place. You gotta be careful.

** How ironic that we typically rail on men for being oblivious to their surroundings... they don't notice when we get our hair cut or wear a new dress, but at least they don't run us over when we're trying to walk across the freaking street.


April said...

amen sister! i almost got hit by a little old lady last week! like i seriously had to jump out of her way!

J said...

Ugg the women drivers here are bad too! Its not even when I am running - its more when I am actually driving! They are crazy ppl out there!

Danielle in Iowa said...

The only verbal altercation I have ever been in with a car was with a female driver. She cut me off and I banged on the back of her car to say "What up, beeyotch? I'm in a crosswalk!" She pulled over and started yelling at me for hitting her car. If she hadn't been on the other side of the street (yes she was yelling across the street), I would have shown her who's boss.

Paul said...

What an interesting observation, Amy. I can assure you it holds true - unfortunately - over here in Oz too.

I have my own theory on this one, since the reverse situation also occurs. Which is to say I only ever have near-misses with *male* drivers.

My theory is this: male drivers always stop for you (females) because it is much easier to check you out when they are stationary and you run by. Why run someone over you are admiring!

But a female driver sees you and is a little intimidated since you are clearly showing them up for all the things they aren't: fit, healthy, a fine specimen of womanhood.

So I don't think it is women's driving ability which is the problem here (actually, I think women are generally safer drivers than us males), but rather an unfortunate manifestation of the old "I hate her cause she's prettier than me" syndrome.

Cheers, PB :-)

Spike said...

sadly, the only time I was ever close to being killed by a car, it was drive by a woman. and, no joke, she had lipstick in her hand. tragic.

April said...

Paul: your reasoning is awesome!