Also a fair bit of this was happening, as well.
I was like... FINALLY I have mastered my metabolism and made it my little bitch. I am Queen of the World.
And then one day I woke up and my pants didn't fit anymore. Meh. I'm just bloated, I thought. And then a week later... the same thing. It was like, I went from 2-3 pounds of extra Kit Kat weight to JABA THE MOTHERFUCKING HUT overnight.
After a week of eating my mom's delicious holiday cooking, I finally decided on Monday that it was time to get this shit under control. I didn't work up the nerve to step on the scale until yesterday, but I was pretty fucking horrified by the number on the scale. Like... you know when you try to brace yourself by coming up with a TERRIBLE number so that when you actually do get on the scale and it's of course lower than that because you aren't a fucking cow, you feel better about yourself? Yeah, I was 5.2 pounds heavier than the terrible number in my head. COW ALERT, COW ALERT!
Needless to say, I'm on the wagon. I am in full on calorie counting mode. And since it's the new year, I thought it would be a good idea to just roll this into a 2015 Resolution. So, here are the things I am going to be focused on this year, in order of importance.
1. GET FIT.
So, every year I'm like.... ohhhh.... I want to get healthy and treat my body well and eat kale and learn to love my body. Fuck that shit. This is the year of Vain Amy. I am going to finally dedicate the time and discipline to get into the BEST SHAPE OF MY LIFE. I am going to be 35 in a month and if I don't do it now, when will I? I am going to hit my goal weight and while I might only stay there for 2 days, I will DO IT. So, that means I'm going to actually have to lift at some point. Any suggestions of videos or books or classes for that... please leave in the comments. I need help because I despise lifting.
2. TAKE CARE OF MY SKIN.
To continue with 2015: The Year of Vain Amy, I am finally going to buckle down and follow through with my skincare regime. My mom is 64 years old and has better skin than me. !!!!! For Christmas, she bought me the entire skincare product line that she uses and I am going to follow through with it each and every day and when I run out of something, I'm going to re-order it. I want to be able to wake up on a Sunday morning and look in the mirror and think... Hmmm... I'll just go without foundation today, instead of shrieking at the horror that is my splotchy complexion.
3. MAKE MOVIES.
I had an epiphany this year. I want to make movies. I've always wanted to tell stories and for ever and ever, I thought that meant that I had to be a writer. Except, I suck at writing (e.g. THIS BLOG). And then it dawned on me.... I can tell stories VISUALLY. DUH. So, I got a camera for Christmas and I am already excited to shoot, plan, edit, and make some little home movies. I think this is it, you guys. I think I might have finally found the creative outlet that I'm built for!
4. READ MORE PAGES.
After years of setting book goals based on the number of books read in a year and years of shying away from BIG books (Anna Karenina, for one) because of that goal, in 2014 I didn't set a goal. But, I did keep track of the books I read and the number of pages in each book. So, in 2014 I read 14 books and a total of 6,759 pages. That's an average of 18.5 pages a day. So, for 2015, I want to average 25 pages a day. (Which is a huge goal).
5. LISTEN TO MUSIC MORE.
I feel like I've fallen of the music wagon in the last 10 years. I used to get so passionate about music and lately, I would rather listen to a podcast. LAME. So, I was kind of thinking of coming up with a thing where I listen to 1 cd each week and focus on that cd. Like, it can be something I've just bought, or an old cd that I've forgotten about. I don't know, this is probably the one resolution that won't be fully flushed out. But, I do want to make a conscience effort to get back into music.
The things like communicate better, listen, further my yoga practice, travel more, run more, further my career goals, knock off states, and cultivate relationships are things that aren't "resolutions" but just something that I'm always striving for, so, I feel like I don't need to list those things out.
I feel good about 2015 and what it will bring. Let's go, 2015. I'm ready!