Well, it's only taken me like 6 or 7 years or whatever, but I think I've finally discovered the KEY. The key that unlocks the mystery of the amazing long run. How often do your long runs just totally suck ass? Uhhh for me... like 91.3% of the time they either moderately suck or just completely suck. But, I've been unintentionally beta testing a formula and this morning I think I realized that THIS IS IT. It's incredibly simple and seems absofuckinglutely ridiculous.
Amy's Long Run Formula For Success:
2-3 glasses of beer or wine + 5 hours of sleep = Long Run Perfection.
W.T.F., right? You're thinking that this goes against everything you've ever heard about preparing for a long run or a race. One, alcohol is supposed to dehydrate you! And everyone always says... drink a shit ton of water before a long run. And, two, how can 5 hours of sleep be enough to power you through 2-3+ hours of running?
I can't explain it. I can only tell you that it works for me. Works brilliantly, in fact.
The amount of alcohol and sleep are KEY here. Any more or any less and the formula breaks down.
Every amazing long run I've ever had (and really, there are probably only like 5 long runs in my entire life that I'd label amazing) I have followed this formula and while I've always kinda jokingly had this idea in the back of my head, I think I'm ready to fully commit to the formula and further my experimentation with it (on purpose).
It even happened to me this morning... I had 2 glasses of wine last night, along with about a 1/3 of a bottle of beer. I got into bed pretty late and had to get up early to get my long run in before work. When I went to bed, all I could think was... ohhhh shit, tomorrow morning is going to suck balls.
But, I woke up really easily when my alarm went off, I felt good as I got ready and when I took my first step, I knew... SHIT YEAH, this run is going to be awesome! And it was! (I mean, it did get a little hot at the end, but what can ya do?).
Intentional testing for Amy's Long Run Formula for Success is officially engaged. The real question is... will I ever have the guts to try it the night before a race??